I was a mediocre husband for 15 years. Today, I teach husbands how to avoid the mistakes I made. How to grow and become great men. The kind their wives swoon over. New content delivered monthly. 👊🏼
Why Couples Drift Apart
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​ When you think of your marriage, it’s unlikely your mind goes to the second law of thermodynamics (or law of entropy), but it needs to. Otherwise, you risk losing the people you love most. In physics, the law of entropy says that all systems, left unattended, will run down. Unless new energy is pumped in, the organism will disintegrate. Entropy is at work in many areas other than physics. I see it, for instance, when I work with couples whose marriages are in trouble. A marriage will not continue to thrive simply because two people love each other, are compatible, and get off to a strong start. To the contrary, marriages left to their own devices wear out, break down, and ultimately disintegrate. This is the law of entropy. To keep our relationships working, we must constantly pump new energy into them. (Alan Loy McGinnis)
It’s the great lie we all swallowed during courtship: “Other relationships might take work, but ours is different. It has special powers. It will always be as awesome as it is now.” We ignored the law of entropy. There’s No Escaping ItWelcome to planet earth, where, left untended:
And people — once wildly in love — drift further apart. So predictably, in fact, that it’s a law. Your marriage falls into disrepair all by itself. We’re ComplicitYour marriage is dying a slow, imperceptible, entropy-induced death. Yes, right now. As you read this. And here’s what’s even scarier: You and I give the culprit a pass. We deny that entropy is real. Sure, we acknowledge our marriage lacks sizzle, but we lie and tell ourselves:
Entropy is a master of disguise. And we’re its patsies. Signs of DeclineThe Gottman Institute studied 30 couples with good-but-less-than-satisfactory marriages. The researchers found that most of the couples:
The law of entropy at work. No one destroys their marriage on purpose. Marriages are destroyed for one simple reason: We neglect them. We stop pumping new energy into them!
Starting on your wedding day, your marriage begins a slow downward slide unless you take action. We have to do something active to counteract the erosion process that’s a normal part of most marriages. (Stephen F. Duncan)
​ Put It to Work
Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least. (Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe)
​ Your Coach, |
Wife Magnet
I was a mediocre husband for 15 years. Today, I teach husbands how to avoid the mistakes I made. How to grow and become great men. The kind their wives swoon over. New content delivered monthly. 👊🏼
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